Monthly Archives: February 2013

cliche as it may sound

I always tell myself that i am at this low(est) point in my life to the point that I have gotten exasperated and have told myself simply that “You sound like a Flo Rida song on loop: Low, low, low, low, low, low, low.” HAHAHA!

The academic semester is about to end, and I am still at my nails biting them out of nervousness. The introduction for my poetics paper is an arduous task. Feminist criticism paper will serve indeed as cause of my embarrassment when I report on my topic soon. My psychiatrist is too busy to see me (or there are just too many of us wishing to see her) that the earliest window in her calendar is March 2, 9PM, which conflicts incidentally with a class schedule. I am tempted to throw my hands in the air in exasperation.

But then there are caveats of kindness, those bells of hope that ring with manic glee. There’s Gold who is always bothering to give me job opportunities. There’s Jaja who greets me from time to time all the way from Riyadh. There are my Hinge friends who supply me with stories/videos/downloads/crazy bonding time to make me laugh out loud. There’s Cor who taped a post-it on my planner that says “Don’t forget to laugh out loud today!” (I tack that post-it from time to time on the latest spread of my planner and will keep on doing it until I use up all of 2013’s days.) There are Tin, Glenn, Philline, Jepoy, Andrew, Bianch who are a joy to be with in those rare times that I get to see them. There are the two cats in our household that entertain me for several minutes with me just watching their antics. There is my housemate who looks after me and who is familiar with, uhm, things that are too illegal to note here. And other people I won’t name here because that’s just my hobby: to share and to be quiet and to annoy at other times.

I have so many things to write about here, but I am dizzy with too much stimuli bombarding my senses. I almost lost myself to a conundrum, you almost lost me, but I am here, and cliche as it may sound, it feels *almost* this good.

dog days

Today, I break this hiatus to write about a famous dog and a little bit about his human, a bit about my dogs, and a whisper about me.

I’ve always stalked Neil Gaiman online but never raved about him outright. I guess when I am too overwhelmed and too in awe, I fall into silence. I respect him, and his words, and his tales. I love him because he is an animal lover, and I love him because when he grieved for Cabal, I found myself peering into a dark space where I will surely find myself when my own dog, Jomari, dies. I love him because he loves his Amanda the way a selfless person loves another human.

He has authored a slew of books, co-authored another handful, and worked with fellow gods of the trade like Clive Barker and Alan Moore. I would love to have my hands on Chu’s Day and The Ocean at the End of the Lane. To date, I have a copy of Fragile Things and a copy of Coraline. I returned with reluctance to its owner a copy of a comic book he created with Dave McKean. I have other gems of Neil’s worlds saved on my phone in e-book format. I owe him my fascination toward Delirium.

To say he is a great writer is an understatement. He is emphatic, is world-wise, but most importantly, he is a dog lover and also owns a handful of cats.

When Cabal died, he felt sorrow. I remember the pets I cared for and prayed that a heaven for animals is being maintained well as I write.

When Dog-dog, the dad of Jomari, fell ill, my siblings and I had him confined. It was a weeklong vigil. He passed on the same year my stepdad died. The dog and probably my stepdad as well were tired.

From time to time, I go on FaceTime to talk to Jomari and Ashley, his fellow cheeky friend at our house. Jomari cocks his head whenever we call out to him. Don’t show him you are crying; it worries him and makes him pad up to you and nudge you with his nose. Or better yet, show him you’re crying. He is a great comfort.

Here is a new project by Neil. Keep an eye out for Cabal and Lola. They’re two of the real reasons why the world is a bit brighter and lighter.

Photo by Kimberley Butler, posted on

Photo by Kimberley Butler, posted on

Neil said of this photo: "The little flashlight around her neck is not really so that she can see better in the dark. It's so I can see her in the night."

Neil said of this photo: “The little flashlight around her neck is not really so that she can see better in the dark. It’s so I can see her in the night.”

All photos and appropriate captions plus Youtube video link are from

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